Have you developed negative traits? Can you change your personality? Do you want to take some actions that can help you develop good characteristics? These are some most commonly asked questions by people. If you have a few personal qualities that you want to change, you’re not alone – many people would like to tweak their personality a little. The good news is that your personality isn’t set in stone, and with some effort, you can change yourself for the better. You can get started by identifying which undesirable traits you want to get rid of and which positive qualities you’d like to develop to replace them.
Change is a time consuming process, and it won’t happen overnight. The idea is to be consistent, and not give up easily. The aim is to be real, not perfect.
So What Can You Really Do to Change Your Personality?
Examine which aspects of your personality bother you:
Be honest with yourself. Which of your personality traits prevent you from living the life you want? Personality traits that get you into trouble, damage your relationships, or interfere with your productivity are probably worth trying to change. If you want to change more than 1 or 2 of your traits, you might find it helpful to make a list. For example, you might include traits like lying, procrastinating, or self-doubt.
Ask a friend or family member for their opinion:
When you’re talking with someone who knows you well, ask them what they think your faults are. An outside opinion may help you see yourself more objectively. It’s possible that you’re too hard on yourself, or that other people see undesirable traits in you that you haven’t noticed. Only ask for another person’s opinion if you’re prepared to hear anything they have to say, positive or negative.
Many of us would be guilty of this habit. It happens so often that we feel lazy to do some task and keep on pushing it to some other day. The task could be tedious, or the deadline would be faraway, either way we feel lazy to do it, and keep things pending till the eleventh hour. The result? We end up turning in a rushed, or a poor-quality piece of work. Don’t let the pile grow bigger and do what you can when you can.
If you tend to over analyse what people say and take their words to heart, you might want to pay heed to improving this trait. Nobody wants to be around someone who cannot take things sportingly. Don’t be a cry baby. Learn to go of things and loosen up a bit.
This surely is a double-edged sword. It harms the other person’s self-esteem plus is a waste of time and energy for you. One must stop gauging what others are doing and pay heed to bettering their own lives. Shift your focus from others life and channel it to your own goals.
Everyone likes it when others like them. But it raises a red flag when you try to change yourself, your personality, and your habits just to please others. Putting on a façade to fit in, is the greatest act of deceit you can do to yourself. It is okay if someone doesn’t like you.
Ask yourself whether you can turn negatives into positives:
Many traits that are often considered negative actually have some positives built into them. Look for ways to preserve the positive part of the trait while minimizing the negative part.For instance, many shy people are good listeners, and many aggressive people make natural leaders.
Choose just one or two traits to focus on at first:
If you try to change multiple personality traits at once, you won’t be able to focus on any of them. Instead, select just one or two of the most important qualities you want to work on, and leave the others for later. Choose a goal that will make your later goals easier to achieve. For instance, if one of your objectives is to stop being lazy and develop a good work ethic, it would make sense to tackle that one first over getting promoted at your job.
Look for opportunities to practice your new behaviors:
To change your personality, you’ve got to perform a new behavior over and over until it seems natural. This is a long process, so don’t miss an opportunity to practice. If you want more opportunities to practice your conversational skills, for instance, you might resolve to go to lunch with your co-workers more often.
It can take months or years for your new personality to really feel like you. This is especially true if you’re over the age of 30. Stay persistent, even if you slip up or your progress is slower than you’d like. If you stick with your goals long enough, your brain will eventually forge the new connections you want.
Keep in mind that developing a new habit will come with setbacks. Try to develop a plan for dealing with setbacks to help you continue to move forward and progress towards your goals.
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